We Have to Talk. Lipton is Just Bad

Everyone loves a good road trip. Depending on the company, at least. Spend 9 hours with two toddlers that hate sitting still for any length of time and you already know. Company matters. But I digress. The beverages chosen are crucial. I'd be lying if I said I haven't guzzled more than my fair share of Lipton's Brisk. Maybe a Pure Leaf or twelve. There's little difference between those sugary drinks and their step brother, Pepsi. You do know they're related, right? Oh yes, both are owned by the mega corporation, Unilever. So you could say Lipton, Hellman's Mayonnaise, Dove soap and loads of other brands are linked in a way that most don't know. You see, companies like this are proud of the "consistency of quality". Don't mistake that for actual quality. For my money, it's a low bar.

I don't personally have anything against Unilever. It's just business. Say what you want, it works for them. But the tea is bad, really bad. How bad is it? Bad like a cheap continental breakfast composed of old bagels; stale boxed cereal, rotten fruit and warm yogurt. And wouldn't you know, weak coffee and bags of Lipton's tea. Everything is connected! I guess this is the part where we have a Lipton's Tea history lesson. Consequently my favorite part. (The tasting part concerns me greatly)

Sir Thomas Lipton, a Scottish entrepreneur, started the Lipton brand in the 1870's. He wanted to make tea more affordable and introduced innovative marketing strategies. Lipton built his own tea estates in various countries to ensure a steady supply of tea leaves. One significant contribution was Lipton's promotion of tea bags. In the early 20th century, he marketed pre-packaged tea in small, porous bags, making brewing tea more convenient and less messy than loose leaves. This innovation greatly contributed to the popularity of tea consumption. I have to give it to Tom. That was a stroke of genuine genius. Lipton's business acumen and commitment helped the brand grow into a global phenomenon.

Unilever acquired the Lipton company in the 1930's, further expanding its reach. Today, Lipton offers a diverse range of teas, including black, green, herbal and flavored varieties, maintaining its position as a widely recognized tea brand worldwide.

Lipton sources it's tea from various regions worldwide to maintain the "quality" and "flavor" of its blends. Common tea-producing countries for Lipton include India, Kenya, Sri Lanka, and China. These regions are known for their favorable climates and soil conditions that support the cultivation of tea plants. This probably is a good time to at least acknowledge some questionable labor practices and some issues with the FDA. This isn't the time for that discussion but if you want to know more, let me know through the contact page. The time has come. The Taste Test.

I observe the rules of the I followed directions by the letter. 4 minutes later. It's time to sip....

We already know. It's not great. Honestly, they shouldn't have been on the list to begin with. The tea isn't even made in the good ole' USA. I'm not going to give you some big, overwhelming review. Honestly Lipton's is so underwhelming, I can't believe I wrote this much.

I'm sure you're thinking "hey! I read that entire piece for this short review. Can't you expand on the tasting?" No. It's the only way for you to understand just how underwhelming it was without subjecting yourselves to drinking that swill yourself.

We have more reviews on the way! Next up. Tazo Tea. Yep, everyone's favorite tea to pour sugar into.

See You Soon;)